Sant Rajinder Singh Ji Maharaj
Has anger become a permanent fixture in your life? Sant Rajinder Singh Ji Maharaj shares the secret to overcoming anger so we can lead happier and more joyful lives.
One of the biggest threats to our peace of mind is the affliction of anger. At work, we often find ourselves angry at our boss, co-workers, or subordinates. Hardly a day goes by when someone or something at work does not disturb our peace of mind. We find that our homes are also a breeding ground for angry reactions. Someone did not pay a bill on time, someone else has gobbled up our favorite dessert, our children are arguing and giving us a headache, or our spouse made a commitment on our behalf that we would rather not keep.
The list goes on and on. Even the trip to and from work stirs up our anger. Smooth flowing traffic suddenly comes to a halt for no reason and we sit motionless for fifteen minutes. Someone does not let us change lanes and we miss our exit. Another driver cuts us off, nearly causing an accident. By the time we get to work, we are agitated and hostile.
It seems life is ready to pounce on us with another situation that stirs us to states of frenzy. Is there any antidote for anger? The more we give in to anger, the angrier we become, and it gains its power over us. We reach a point in which we lose total control and end up doing or saying something that hurts others and ourselves.
The secret to overcome anger, is to stay calm in the face of whatever is happening. As we face problems at home, at the office, or in traffic, we should not react in anger. We can recognize that the problems are there. We can take steps to solve the problem. We can even be proactive and try to remove the agitating source by communication or by finding solutions, while trying to avoid becoming angry.
Anger is not going to eliminate problems. All it will do is raise our blood pressure, cause fight-or-flight hormones to circulate through our body and make us ill, keeping our mind in a state of obsessive agitation.
The anger does not cause others to stop doing what they are doing. All anger does is make us sick and ineffective. But if we remain calm, we can tackle the problem with all our faculties fully in our control and we can find a more effective solution. We will have more energy to solve the problem.
Step by Step
So, what are the steps to overcoming anger?
FIRST: When we feel ourselves getting angry we should not say or do anything immediately. Rather, we should take a deep breath and slow down.
SECOND: We should sit in meditation. We should remove ourselves from the situation to be alone, and sit in a state of calm meditation. We should realize that the longer we can remain calm, quiet, and composed, the less energy anger will have, and it will gradually vanish.
Let us destroy anger by our calmness, equipoise, and balance. We will find that while the same situations that incite us every day continue, we will not become slaves to them. We can calmly pass through them using our body, mind, and energy for more constructive purposes and we will feel happier, more joyful, and more peaceful.
Want to Learn More?
When we focus on examining our thoughts, we need to evaluate what aspects of ourselves we want to cleanse. We need to understand what is cluttering our minds and hearts and keeping us from opening up to God’s love.
The secret to desires is that it is not the object we desire. It is the mind’s tendency to always be in a state of desire. It leads us into attachment to things of this world. It distracts us from the true purpose of our human life.
We can avoid much of the stress, anxiety, and tension that faces us at the mental level by learning the technique of meditation. Meditation is a way to relieve stress at the mental level and help us have a healthy mind. A healthy mind means that we can deal with the challenges of life in a calm, composed way without it causing us to feel upset, depressed, anxious, fearful, or threatened.
The next time we think things are going badly and that God is not listening to us, we should sit back, take a deep breath, and relax. We should give God a chance to let things happen, and observe patiently. We will find when all is said and done that God worked things out for the best in the end.
How does anger arise? Does it only affect us at the emotional level or do we do physical harm to ourselves when we give in to anger? How can we break free from its grip and what are the benefits of doing so?
If each of us, individually, learned how to meditate, and applied it to help us through our day-to-day challenges, we would find ourselves calmer and more effective in what we do.